Alex and his first “Buzz Cut” as he likes to call it. He was happy to have short hair like daddy.

Alex likes to mimic my morning routine and is always in the bathroom with me while I am getting ready. He loves playing with my shaving brush and likes to brush his teeth when I am brushing mine.

A few days ago he asked for deodorant because “his armpits stink”. I have an all natural vegan deodorant that is safe enough for him to use so he has claimed it as his own.

This morning, he referred to the deodorant as “Toyota” and continued to call it that when I tried to correct him. He was actually angry when I told him he was wrong about the name and insists that it is his “Toyota”.

Always an entertaining time with him.

Alex enjoying bath time last night.

He loves the red cup and likes to pour water over everything, including himself.

Alexander excited to open his gifts on Christmas morning.

When he gets really excited, his hands go into his mouth. Does not happen often, but when it does it is pretty cute.

The primary color picture that Alex has been carrying around the house.

When it was complete, he brought it to me full of pride at what he had just created.  It was a chart with circles of each primary color, and the color names above them.

You should have seen him!  He was beaming with pride about his creation, and he should be.

He has carried that picture with him everywhere and even tried to take it to bed last night.

He has asked that I buy magnets so we can mount it on the wall.

—–

I have not seen Travis much the past few months.  He has been busy with school and was having some trouble.

When I do see him, it is usually a five minute hello and goodbye thing.

He has been staying with Toni more and it looks like that is how it will probably be from here on out.  I understand it because that is his mother, I just wish we could spend some time together having fun like we used to do.

Travis is a tough one.  I love him with everything I have, but I am disappointed that he tends to not be honest with me and lie frequently.  When that happens, it is hard to trust him.

I hope we can at least repair some of the damage from the separation and divorce.

—–

I have been working a lot, and the stress is getting to me.  Everything else is fine but work stress some days is amazing.

—–

My relationship with Barb is great.  Never thought I would find someone that I click with this way.  We just “get” each other and there is no bullshit.

This is what a healthy relationship should be like.

I know people do not want to hear it, and think I am making bad moves, but the bottom line is that I am happy now after years of not being very happy.

You either accept that or you do not.

—–

I think people are still in shock over the divorce with Toni and they think it was all so sudden.  What they do not realize is that the two of us had been unhappy for years, and we were both good at covering it up.

I know it all seems sudden for people looking at it from the outside, but I can honestly say it was something that had been going on for a long time.

I hope that she can find someone that makes her happy, that is good to Alex and completes her life.  I really want that for her.  She deserves it.

We are both moving on, and that is just reality.

—–

I am probably going to put this place on a shelf for a bit.  Not sure if I want to continue updating it.

I am going to probably archive all of the stuff about the pregnancy and Alex into a personal scrap book for him so he has something to read when he is older and can understand everything that happened during the time of his birth.

I have been fighting it, did not want to admit it, but I finally have to get over the fact that he is no longer a toddler.

Alex is at a point where we can have a decent conversation about things.  He can express his feelings more than ever, and he is not shy about what he wants to say.

Alex loves to help with everything!  Making dinner is a big deal now.  Alex must help, even if it is something small like pouring a liquid or mixing something together, he has to be involved.  All very good things to see.

Alex is telling me about his life outside of the time I spend with him.  Again, great stuff that shows me he can remember things and can be creative.

Love my time with him right now and am enjoying what he brings to my life.

Now if I could just get him to wipe…

—–

We were in the bathroom last night and I had to pee.  He has come into the bathroom with me since he was old enough to stand, and he has always been fascinated with the whole going pee thing.

He looks at me, points to my crotch as says “What is that?”

“My penis”

“Oh, I have a penis and you have a penis” he says.  I was proud of him, good job on picking that up.

Then he dropped the bomb.

He screams “You have a huge penis!”

I died.  Seriously.

I was glad nobody else was in the house at the time.  Actually, now that I think about it, I wish I had a house full of beautiful women to hear that. :)

—–

Alex says it is no longer “Christmas time”, that we are now in “Happy New Year time”.  This means he walks around the house with a birthday hat on all of the time.

He tries to get me to wear the hat with him but I’ve resisted so far.

Now I need to tell him that “Happy New Year time” is almost over and come up with something new.  Ideas?

A few days ago he said that the newspaper was “hobo” after he had opened it and scattered it all over the place.

I asked him if it meant horrible, and he said yes.  So it’s not “hobo cheese” it was “horrible cheese”.  Awesome.