Toni has been working on this with him when she has him, and I have been grilling him when he is with me.  He will now sing it randomly on his own.

Alex is counting from 1 to 10 now on his own well.  These are big milestones for a boy that will not turn three until October 23rd.

—–

I am completing the purchase of a 2006 Infiniti M45 Sport this week.  Drove the car last weekend and it felt so good.  Hard to pass up on the deal as I am purchasing the car well under Blue Book value.

The car is loaded with everything a tech nerd like me could want and I cannot wait to pick it up this weekend.

The only thing I do not like is the color.  It is gold.  That is an old man color but I can live with that.

—–

My roof is falling apart.  Shingles have been sliding off the roof the last few years and each year someone comes out to repair.  It is getting to the point where I will probably need to replace the roof on the house and I am not happy about it.

This is a 30 year roof, and it was placed on the house back in 2001.   The contractor that did the work is no longer in business, and they had no idea what they were doing when the roof was placed.  Pisses me off.

Now I get to have it repaired again in the next few weeks to the tune of $500.  Ouch!  At least it should last until I can get the money together to replace the entire roof.

—–

We celebrate all three boys birthdays this weekend.  Sean just turned 21, Travis will be 16 next week and Alex will be 3 on the 23rd.

This will be the first time both sides of our families will be together in one room since Toni and I split.  I do not expect things to be ugly or anything as we have kept this civil, but I am sure it will be uncomfortable for some.

We bought Travis a new laptop for his birthday and I still need to pick something up for Alex.  Sean will get money.

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Friday was interesting.  A last minute offer to go out with a friend I have not seen since High School ended up being a damn fun evening.

Met up with Barb, Stephanie and Alexis at the Rock for drinks and a meal, then walked next door and met Tad at the Swiss for more drinking and fun.

Have not seen Barb in 20 years or so, and Stephanie was also a Wilson grad but we ran in a different circle of friends.  She looked familiar and it bugged me most of the night.  I know it will click one of these days.  Tad also graduated from Wilson, a few years ahead of me but turns out we know some of the same people.  Funny how it works.

Anyway, a fun night and I finally made it home at 4am.  Have not done that in a long time but man, did I pay for it.  Was tired all weekend.  I have no idea I used to do that every weekend and not feel a thing.  I’ll blame it on age.

—–

Had to get up Saturday morning at 8am so Toni could drop Alex off.  Four hours of sleep and then entertaining Alex was surprisingly easy.

I had to run errands most of the morning so we did not get out like we usually do, but still had fun.

That afternoon Travis and I participated in the Light The Night Walk for Lymphoma down on Ruston.   We did this to raise money and honor his grandma Genie who died last February.  It was an amazing walk and I was humbled by the stories of survival.  Glad we were there.

Our team, Genies Journey, raised close to 4,000 bucks and we were one of the top teams overall.  Thanks to the generosity of friends and family for the donations, you are all very special.

—–

I am still painting Alexanders room.  I know it is slow going, but I am almost done!  It is difficult to paint while I have him, so I can only do this when he is staying with Toni.   I have him almost all weekend so the only real chance for me to paint is on Sunday afternoons.

I should have the last section of wall complete today or tomorrow.  Then it is ceiling and trim time.   Excited to get it done.  I also need to make a trip to Ikea to pick up a hanging lamp for his room that doubles as a night ligt.  It projects sun, moon and stars on the walls when lit.

Once I have his room done I am considering a repaint of my bedroom.   My bedroom is a dark wine red color, and it is very dark int he room.   This was a good thing and done because I was working nights at the time, and had to sleep when it was sunny.

I am no longer working nights and I am tired of the dark room.  Need to lighten things up a bit.

I also want to repaint the living room and dining rooms.  They are in dire need of touch up work, and it’s really at a point where I should just go all out and paint everything.

I am really depressed and cannot seem to shake myself out of it.  I know it will pass but man… this has been tough.

I feel like I am walking around with a lump in my throat all of the time, ready to kind of break down for no reason.  Must be man hormones or the rain or something.  :)

I think another part of this is being alone.  I have not been alone for 14 years and now when Toni comes to pick up Alex, the house is just silent.  Still trying to get used to that.

Add to that the lack of friends and well, you get the idea.

Toni was my best friend, and she is gone.

It feels like she died, and when I do see her it is like I am catching glimpses of her ghost.

I have been keeping busy, and there are a million things I need to get done around the house, but it would be so much better to have someone to do them with.  Someone to share that experience with.

I should quit my bitching and just get over it, but days like today make that difficult.

And for those wondering, she stopped reading this a long time ago… Well before the separation, but that is another story.

—–

Travis started school last week and it has been interesting.  He is dual enrolled right now with two courses at Lincoln High School and his core classes through WAVA (Washington Virtual Academy).

The transition to WAVA has been rough.  We have been all over the place with the admissions adviser assigned to us.  She does not respond to email or phone calls, and we get conflicting information on what paperwork has been filed or is needed.

As of today, the first day of WAVA classes, Travis is still not fully enrolled with WAVA and he has no classes.  I am not happy about it.

I finally have one of the main folks from the WAVA office looking into this, but we really should not be at this point.  I had hoped this would be resolved before classes started.

If this is not resolved by Friday, we have no choice but to put Travis back into Lincoln full time, and he is going to hate it.

—–

I have spent the past week painting Alexanders play room.  I am converting it into his new big boy bedroom.   Progress is slow, but steady.

I made the mistake of letting Alex paint on one wall the first day I started the project.  He was fine until he saw me break out the paint roller.  He wanted one, and there was no way that was going to happen.

I got through half of the room before giving up.  Alex was everywhere.  Hand prints on fresh paint, scratching fresh paint, etc. and it was just too much.

I spent time last night patching holes and doing prep work so I can finish painting the walls this weekend.   Hopefully I can get the ceiling done as well.

We are going with a blue theme for his room. Moon, Sun and Stars! Walls are a sky blue, ceiling is starry night dark blue and trim/accents are white and grey.

Once the walls are done, I will be painting some of his old dressers to match the room.  I plan to make a clock that will be shaped like a huge sun on one of his walls.

The ceiling will be home to glow in the dark stars and moons and I am picking up a lamp from Ikea that will project stars and moons on the walls at night.  Very soothing.

This is a big project for me.  In the past, Toni was the one that did all of this stuff and laughed because I was never very handy around the house.  We’ll see who laughs once this is complete…

showerhead

Originally uploaded by eropel.

Because getting shampoo on your kids head, and making funny hair things is fun.

This is what makes Alex so fun. He lives for things like this and enjoys every second of it. Plus he is willing to sit still while I snap a photo or two.

Got to spend time Saturday night with old friends from High School.  It felt great to get out and have some adult fun and I really needed it.  Having not seen everyone for a long time makes me appreciate the friendships even more.  Wish we could all get together more than once or twice a year.

Thursday night I grabbed Alex and we went to dinner at Tamara and Martys.  I was not sure how Alex would handle being with a bunch of strange adults, but he did well and I was proud of him.

Usually Alex will be shy and kind of hold back.  Not the case this time around.  He was running around and approaching people, talking and generally having a great time.

Alex was a little obsessed with their sliding glass door…. sorry Tamara!  (open, close, open, close)

—–

We purchased Alex a potty chair a long time ago, hoping that he would actually use it as intended.  It doubles as a stool and he is at least putting that part to good use.

Alex loves to stand on the stool in the kitchen.  It is like an entirely new universe for him!  He loves to watch me cook, and wants to help or do things on his own.  I don’t blame him, the kitchen is a pretty fun place when you think about it.

He is tall enough now that he can just reach the cupboards above the counter while standing on the stool.  He will open them and point to things that he wants to eat.  “I want…”  or “I need…”

Growing so fast!

We are spending a lot of time working on colors.  He is improving by leaps and bounds in the past two weeks.  Really impressed with his ability to learn.

I am also working on his term “loud noise!” to teach him that there is loud and soft noises.  Right now everything to him is a loud noise no matter what it is.

—–

I spent most of yesterday getting some repairs and projects done around the house.  Someone or something ripped half of the gutter from my garage on the alley side.  Not happy about it but it was an easy fix.

Grabbed a ladder and hammer and went to work on it.  Alex was next to me the entire time, handing me tools and being my mini sidekick.  He loved it!

Next was an install of a new mailbox that has been sitting in the house for a year.  We picked it up and next got around to installing it.  Once again, I had my sidekick with me and he handed me the screws and screwdriver when needed.

Alexanders dexterity with tools is impressive.  He has figured out how to use the screwdriver and is at a point where he can open/close caps on things.

It sounds simple, but I never realized how tough it must be to learn how top screw/unscrew a cap.

Then I have days like yesterday where everything he did was like having a “big kid” in the house.  It’s amazing to watch the transformation from baby to toddler to little kid.

Independence is a huge thing for Alex right now.  He wants to climb into the SUV and get into his seat on his own, he wants to get down on his own, he wants to pour his own milk and the list goes on and on.  Really, it feels like that happened over night.

Over the next few weeks I will be cleaning and painting Sean’s old room and converting it into a bedroom for Alex.  I’ve been wrestling with color choices and finally decided to just ask Alex what color he wanted me to paint the walls.

“Blue”

And there you have it.

The move from 2.5 years to 3 feels like such a huge leap!

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We decided to feed the ducks, even thought he weather was cloudy and cold.

We were the only people feeding the ducks so… the ducks were a tad aggressive. things started out slow and controlled but man, did it escalate quickly! At one point, the ducks were trying to climb on me. Never had that happen before.

Alex did not want to give up the cracker he was holding, deciding to eat it rather than give it to a goose that was standing in front of him. Alex got a little too close to the goose, and that cracker was gone. Alex, almost in tears, got mad but then decided that throwing food at animals was amusing and the cracker throwing began with gusto.

We ran out of crackers quickly and Alex told me he wanted to walk. We were walking down the paths when Alex noticed that we were being followed. He started running away from me and I just thought he was being funny… until I turned around and saw what he was running from.

The ducks and geese were following us. Flanked on one side by ducks in the water, with another set of ducks and geese coming up behind us. I have never seen ducks and geese run before.

We finally separated ourselves from the gaggle of geese and the flock of ducks and made our way to the flower garden. I thought that the flower garden area would be a good place to teach Alexander colors.

I have been working with an aide from the Tacoma Learning Center to help me teach Alexander. Colors is the current item on our plate.

Alex did well, and was focused on what I was asking him the entire time. I would say “Show me a yellow flower” and he would run and point them out. We lasted a solid 30 minutes of color teaching before it was time to grab a snack and head out.

On our way out of the park we came across an event at Fort Nisqually. Some sort of old time festival. Of course, we had to stop and check it out. Guns firing, horses, people dressed in period costumes, you name it they had it on display.

We did not last long, maybe 15-20 minutes but it was a good experience for Alex to get out into a crowd.

—–

I have dropped from 195lbs down to 174lbs as of this morning. This is a good thing.

I am eating better and have started a new exercise program that is kicking my ass. In a good way.

Toni has been gone since the end of June. It feels like years and things are still rough. It looks like our relationship if pretty much over, and it is devastating to me.

I hold out hope that we can work things out, but it takes two people to want that and right now we only have one. Very sad.

Alex, running around with nothing but his Fireman hat that we picked up at the Proctor street fair last weekend.

Yes, I know he will freak out when he is older and looks at this, but that is what parenting is all about!

Typically, after his morning shower, Alex likes to run around the house naked.  Pretty normal for most kids.  The past few weeks he has been using “props” for his nakey run.

Capes, shoes, toys, whatever he can get his hands on.  This time is was the hat.

Yes, I am aware he has a farmers tan.  He wears a Baby Banz UV protection swimsuit in the summer which results in the farmers tan.

Love this goofy kid of mine lots and lots.

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Wednesday I managed a few things but the time slipped away and I had to pick up Alex from day care.  I did get the chance to check out a new day care but I think I am going to hold off for now and keep him where he is at.

Sean called Wednesday night and asked if Elizabeth and Silas could come stay with me on Thursday.  Elizabeth had just completed a surgery and it was difficult for her to take care of the baby.  They also brought Sean’s sister CeCe along.

So I had a house full on Thursday.  Elizabeth, Silas, CeCe and Alex.  I thought it would be rough but everything turned out great.  Cece was a huge help and loved playing with Alex.  She can come play at our house any time!

Everyone left around 6pm so… Thursday was gone.  None of the errands I planned that day were taken care of so everything got pushed to Friday.

Friday morning Alex had an appointment with HopeSparks to work on his sensory and development.  His progress is moving along and he is doing great according to Brianna.    Brianna says that she can see a lot of development in him the past month, and he is doing great.

I also spent Friday getting my vehicle emissions done, and made a quick trip to the Liquor store to pick up an local Absinthe that I have wanted for a long time now.

I spent Saturday like I also do with Alex.  We wake up, walk to the coffee stand to get a chocolate milk and a Lemon Italian soda, then hit the Whitman playground for an hour or so.   By the time we get home Alex is ready for a nap.   We spent the afternoon at Titlow Beach and had a lot of fun.

Sunday was all about baseball.  Toni picked Alex up and I headed to the Rainiers game.  The heat… was amazing.  Hot but lots of fun.

Alex has not cried when being dropped off at Day Care.   I spent time with him last night and this morning telling him he was going to have a great, fun day playing with other kids and spending time outside.

He gave me a little sideways look when I dropped him off, and there was some hesitation but no crying.  That is a big step.

Travis stayed with me last night but I did not get a chance to see him.  He spends every other Wednesday at a church group down the road.  He enjoys it and it tends to last several hours.   He was home after I went to bed.

I have been trying to plan something fun to do this weekend.  I think I will take Alex down to Pt. Defiance and walk around the gardens, then down to the beach area.  He loves walking and I would like to give him a change of scenery.

I have a much better outlook on life right now than I did last week, and that is something…