Baby Wigs, Sleepy Time, Video Games and Killer Squirrels
Posted on September 29, 2006 - Filed Under General
The Daily Mail claims “Outrage as US baby wig craze hits Britain“. I have photographic proof that my family started the baby wig craze in late 1968 or early 1970, and that I was the first baby wig model.
A certain aunt who shall remain anonymous decided that it would be quite the fashion statement to plop a nice flowing black wig on top of my head before I had completed the first year of my life. An image was captured but remains in custody of my mother who I will urge to sue the baby wig manufactures for millions because they stole our idea.
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Lack of sleep has been a major issue for me the past few weeks. 
I have had a difficult time sleeping through the night often waking up every hour or two looking at the clock and getting angry. I’ve been looking for a cause and assumed it was stress related to the new baby coming and with some new assignments at work.
Toni has not been sleeping well for a few months because the baby appears to be nocturnal and likes to do flip flops all night so she decided to spend birthday money on bed stuff.
The first item was “450 thread count” sheets. I had no idea there was an actual difference in thread count for sheets but it appears that it makes a difference. Supposedly the 450 thread count makes your sheets feel like silk. Personally I didn’t notice much of a difference and I think they smell funny, even after she washed them.
Toni hit a home run with the next items! New comfort foam pillows and a thick mattress memory foam topper. The negative? New comfort foam smells horrible, like the inside of someones mouth after they’ve smoked 20 packs of cigarettes. So… I can sleep in comfort, as long as I hold my breath. Awesome.
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Another family decides to sue a video game maker because a 14-year old boy killed his father, stepmother and stepsister. Their attorney is the infamous Jack Thompson who has been on a crusade to blame video games for every evil thing kids do.
The $600 million lawsuit claims that Cody Posey played the game Grand Theft Auto (Rated M for mature) obsessively for several months before the killing, which of course must be the reason he shot his family to death right?
Posey himself stated to police that he killed his family because his father had slapped him for not cleaning horse stalls fast enough, and that his father had abused him several times in the past.
Jack Thompson says that there was a Playstation 2 and the game Grand Theft Auto in the boys possession, and that the game trained him to kill. I’d like to know where the 14-year old kid got the GUN he was able to kill his family with. If it belonged to his family, are they not responsible for making sure it is secure? And why is a 14-year old kid playing a game that is rated M for mature? Was it purchased for him by a family member as a gift?
It’s tragic, but let’s at least look in the right direction and stop blaming games when a kid goes nuts.
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Finally we have KILLER SQUIRRELS attacking children at Cuesta Park in Mountain View. A squirrel, described as “fierce” (stop laughing) attacked a 4-year old boy while trying to wrestle a muffin away from the tot. The boy is recovering and is the happy recipient of a series of rabies shots because the squirrel bit him.
Six people have been attacked since May which has caused alarm in the Mountain View community. Mountain View rangers have drafted a plan of action for an all out squirrel assault but stand little chance of success. How would you like to sit in on that meeting?
“Sir, we have reports that the squirrels have regrouped and are organizing a new attack on the innocent children of Mountain View”
First organized raccoons are killing cats and dragging away dogs in Olympia, now we have killer squirrels in Mountain View. What’s next? Pigeon air force dive bombing pedestrians along the waterfront? Crazed killer salmon fighting back against fishermen?
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